Transgender Book Reviews

Bert and Lori: The Autobiography of a Crossdresser
Nonfiction by Robert J. Rowe
Copyright 1997, 388 pages, $26.95 (hardbound)
Prometheus Books
ISBN 1-57392-149-1

Capsule: Author Robert Rowe , a scholar, incisively traces his life as a crossdresser who enjoys the erotic and spiritual aspects of wearing women's clothing. The book goes beyond autobiography by adding research, other literature, myths, and even the author's wife's comments. A clear, uncensored look at crossdressing as a major turn-on.

Full review

This is a solid, entertainining book, and the author has successfully recreated scenes where his crossdressing began, expanded, was self-suppressed and then finally reached full flower with an understanding partner.

Bert and Lori unabashedly examines the sexual component of crossdressing in the author's life. "Bert's" crossdressing nearly always involves sex, whether by masturbation or with a woman (he never goes out in public dressed). One nearly stands in the author's shoes as he tries on his mother's lingerie and has his first (involuntary) ejaculation.

As Bert matures, his life has two interesting compartments -- his very successful academic career which culminates in a professorship of art history -- and his sexual/crossdressing/woman-loving side. The college side seems very orderly, open and masculine, while his sexuality is his secret wild side, mingling with powers and compulsions often beyond his control. During his adolescence and early college days, Bert wants to share his dressing with his many lovers, but beyond a few tentative moves, nothing happens until his first marriage. Unfortunately, "Nadine" rejects his sleeping in her nightie out of hand. Their marriage ends in divorce.

Throughout the book, the author speculates as to why he is fascinated with petticoats, full skirts, frilly ribbons, corsets, the desire to be sexually teased/tormented, and why lovemaking is enhanced by the wearing of female clothing. His fascination with certain kinds of transvestite fantasy literature offers clues to his mindset.

Of interest to this reviewer are Rowe's views of crossdressing as something transcendental. He writes: "... dressing up has provided me with a glimpse of something extraordinarily beautiful and peaceful, something I believe with good reason can be called 'spiritual' or 'divine.' ... I occasionally fall back upon conventional Christian terminology and refer to my own experiences as 'numinous' or 'spiritual'." He quotes Camille Paglia: "A woman putting on men's clothes merely steals social power. But a man putting on women's clothes is searching for God."

After his divorce, the author buries himself in scholarly research, but he soon finds Jill, who has also left a bad marriage. She is attractive, sexy, and everything else he could want. They marry and have a baby. Perhaps because he worships her so much, he can't bring himself to introduce "Lori" into the marriage bed until the sixth year. His wife's reaction is predictable. As she writes in her part of the book: "Wasn't I enough for my husband? What had I done wrong? Was Bert a closet homosexual? ... Why was I being asked to participate in perverse rituals ... [?]"

But in the end, Jill shares Bert's levelheaded objectivity. She comes to admit Lori into her life, with some humor and perspective. Because Lori makes Bert feel so hot and alive, Jill sees her as a contribution to their relationship -- within limits. And so ends the story portion of the book.

(Reviewer: Valory Gravois) (Copyright ©1999 by Alchemist/Light Publishing)

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